Things to do after the Death of a Loved One
None of us likes to think about death, but we know that it is one thing that we can count on happening. Grief is overwhelming at this time and we forget simple things that need to be done. This list will be helpful to you at this time of bereavement. It will help tell you who to contact, what to do to organize the funeral and information needed, and name changes that will have to be made.
FIRST ONES TO CONTACT:
CORONER:
The hospice, nursing home, or police department will help to handle this for you. It is a trying time and they will be very gracious and helpful. If you have any questions that this booklet can not or did not answer for you, please ask them now. These people are in the field of helping and understand what you are going through and will do everything they can to make things easier on you.FUNERAL HOME:
If you would like, any of the above people, will also be glad to call the funeral home of your choice to have them come. If you have not made arrangements before hand, a time will be set up with the funeral home director at this time for you to go there and to make all of the final arrangements.
PLEASE TAKE THESE ITEMS ALONG AT THIS TIME:
A picture of the deceased if you would like this in the paper (Also for hair style)
Clothes for the deceased
IT ALSO HELPS IF YOU CAN TALK THESE THINGS OVER WITH THE FAMILY BEFOREHAND SO YOU HAVE SOME IDEA OF WHAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO HAVE DONE:
I. The Obituary
How you would like to have the Obituary written; Parents names and Grandparents names;
Marriage date;
Work (places or businesses owned);
Military service;
Family of deceased (starting with wife, children, sisters, brothers etc.);
Deceased members of the family member
II. Parts of the Service
Music you would like to have played ,a poem read, maybe a bible verse
Name of minister
Is there a separate person to do the Eulogy
Will a soloist be used
Will you have a “Memory Board” for the deceased ( a board made up of pictures of the deceased and family members showing the happy times of the deceased’s life) This is normally put together by the children, grandchildren ,sisters, brothers or cousins of the deceased.
Pallbearers; names of all of the people involved
Time you would like to have the service and if you would like a showing would you like to have this all on the same day or two separate days. Take into consideration if you have a lot of out-of-town people coming.
Name of the cemetery where the burial will take place, plot number also if you have it.
How many death certificates will you need? You will need these for insurance policies, Social Security office, investments, and people that may have the deceased on their insurance policies as a beneficiary. Make sure that you get enough of these now. They are cheaper getting them through the funeral home at this time.
OTHER PLANS FOR THE FUNERAL:
III. OUT OF TOWN GUESTSA. Do you have to make accommodations for out-of-town people, do it at this time or
designate this to someone else to help to coordinate this. It is also a good idea at this time to have the coordinator contact a few motels to see if they have
accommodations and then make a list to keep near the phone with prices and contact numbers for those from out of town that call for help finding places. It is cheaper
to have this handy for them so they don’t have to make long distance calls.
Are you having a small meal after the funeral or possibly cake and coffee for thosethat are traveling a distance? Have someone set up a place: possibly the church fellowship hall, a home, restaurant or the funeral home may have a lounge area you may use for this purpose.
Order the flowers and decide if there is going to be a color theme that you would like the family to stick too. Your coordinator can help to make a list to keep by the phone in case of calls from other members of the family. Live plants and trees are always a nice way of keeping the memory of the deceased alive for years to come. Does a V.F.W. need to be contacted for a military funeral? They also may help with a hall for the luncheon and the auxiliary could also be of service.
Go to order the monument, or you may want to set up an appointment for the following week. There isn’t any hurry at this point to get this finished, but most people feel better when they know that everything is taken care of and that they have everything ready. At this point, take your time and only do what makes you comfortable
If you do not have a cemetery plot you can let the funeral home director know this And he/she can help you to contact the right people. You also may want to see if Your local cemetery has a ROSE GARDEN if the deceased has decided to useCremation. This is a very beautiful place and peaceful and is used more and more These days.
AFTER THE FUNERAL/WHO TO CONTACT
INSURANCE’S
A. Insurance Agent/CompanyAgents through
personal life insurance policies try to have as many policy numbers ready as possible, it will cut down on the amount of time it takes to process your claim.
B. Union contacts for life insurance through themCredit card companies that a policy may be given for free or you may have purchased a small policy through
C.Mortgage company (home loan)
D.Bank (also may have a policy that was given for free)
A. Don’t forget to check the safety deposit boxPension insuranceCar Insurance (there may be a separate policy)Accident Insurance ( look for a small policy that may have been taken out separately)
E. Military/Veterans Administration (contact Veterans Affairs Office)there may be a life insurance policy check about veterans benefits if there are small children or if person was in the service over 20 years
F.Work: Check for a pension There may be accumulated sick leave/vacation time to be paid out for
G. OtherProfessional groups or organizations
H. Social Security Office ( if a spouse, this is $255.00)you will need to have social security numbers for the deceased, yourself, and any children. You will also need birth certificates,and your marriage certificate (if this is for a spouse).
If you have not contacted your lawyer, you should do this now; there are papers that will have to be filed and possibly a will to be read. He will guide you further in your time of grief.
ITEMS TO BRING ALONG
Death Certificate
Social Security numbers for the deceased, your children and yourself
The Will
Investments
House deed
Insurance payments
Annuity payments
Credit card bills
Loan payments and amounts dueIf it is a husband include any bill or loan with deceased’s name on
TRANSFER OR CHANGE NAMES
Bank accounts that are in both namesBrokerage Accounts
Credit cards that have both names on should be changed to survivors name
Credit cards that are in deceased husbands name may need a death certificate to close out the account and depending on the amount of the estate this needs to be included in the probate.(check with attorney)
Telephone and Long Distance carriers
Utility CompaniesChange beneficiaries on insurance policies
Car or Vehicle titles
Medical and Health Insurance Policies
Please check with your ATTORNEY, SOCIAL SECURITY OFFICE, and INSURANCE AGENT to make sure that everything is taken care of. Also, you may have different rules and regulations for your state that have not been included in this booklet. Remember, this is only a GUIDE.
©2000-2007 JAN HAYNER ORGANIZING YOUR LIFE THE EASY WAY ALL RIGHTS RESERVED